


definitely something

by bazookajo94



Category: All For The Game - Nora Sakavic
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Casual Intimacy, Chaotic Neil Josten, Gay Disaster Andrew Minyard, M/M, Oblivious Neil Josten, Weddings, andrew is very cuddly, don’t even worry about the angst in this, im back on my bullshit of casual intimacy and love, it’s non-existent, kevin is borderline dating aaron in this but it's never discussed, neil and kevin are best friends, neil is andrew's math tutor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-16
Updated: 2020-10-16
Packaged: 2021-03-09 01:53:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,011
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27036760
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bazookajo94/pseuds/bazookajo94
Summary: In order to get over his ex who is getting married, Kevin forces Neil to go into a pact with him: they each have to find each other’s dates to the wedding, since clearly Kevin can’t be trusted to find someone good for himself, and Neil is just hopeless.Neil thinks he’s found a good match for Kevin in Andrew: he’s good at exy, he can tolerate Kevin at his worst, and he always turns up whenever Kevin and Neil are out and about. Neil is pretty sure Andrew is half in love with Kevin already.Andrew is, obviously, very much into Neil.
Relationships: Neil Josten/Andrew Minyard
Comments: 76
Kudos: 830
Collections: All For The Game random short stories





	definitely something

**Author's Note:**

> i read this horrible awful [book](https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/32053864-leo-loves-aries) (really, it was not good and this is not a recommendation) with a plot that inspired this. canonically this fic is reminisce of when andrew came over to makeout with neil but neil didn't catch on right away so andrew threw the tab of his beer at neil's face like "can u pay attention to me now" lol andrew is so funny i love him

Kevin bemoaned the upcoming nuptials of Jean and Jeremy for the fifth time in the last thirty minutes, and Neil turned the page of the magazine he wasn’t reading.

“I just don’t know what went wrong,” Kevin sighed.

“Mmhm,” Neil said.

“We were doing so well!”

“Yeah.” Neil turned another page, sniffed the residue of the cologne sample on the page. He hummed appreciatively before turning the page again. 

Kevin’s head lolled along the back of the couch in the direction of Neil. “A year! We were together for a year!”

“A whole year.” Neil’s voice was thick with false sympathy and practiced words. He frowned at the completed crossword on the page. Damn. He’d already rifled through this magazine.

“I just can’t believe they invited us to the wedding.”

“Atrocious.”

“I mean, Jean was your best friend!”

“He’s still my best friend.”

“And Jeremy and Jean went _behind our backs_ and _fell in love._ ”

“I wasn’t dating Jean.”

“Weren’t you?” Kevin shook his head. “Doesn’t matter. You might as well have been dating.”

“What?”

“This is a betrayal, Neil.”

“Okay.”

“And now they invite us to the wedding? As best men?”

“Actually, only I’m—”

“Sh, Neil.”

Neil closed his mouth and then lamented that he had turned to the last page of the magazine already. He tossed the glossy book on the table and rubbed his eyes.

Kevin said, “We’ve got to do something about this.”

“Just don’t go to the wedding. Problem solved.” This is not the first time Neil suggested this to Kevin. 

“Neil, you can’t skip the wedding, you’re the best man.”

“I didn’t say _I_ wouldn’t go.”

Kevin, after grumbling some more and eating from the scant peanuts he had piled on his chest, suddenly sat up in an uncharacteristic burst of energy Neil hadn’t seen in him since Jeremy left him. Peanuts clattered sadly to the floor. One clung to the fabric of Kevin’s shirt admirably. Neil thought about picking it off his shirt and eating it, but he knew how often Kevin did his laundry and decided not to touch anything on Kevin’s body. “That’s it!” Kevin exclaimed. “We’ll go to the wedding.”

“Novel idea,” Neil said, standing up. Maybe he’d go to bed. It was only seven in the evening, but he could go to bed now, right? Dealing with Kevin’s wedding-bell blues would make anyone exhausted, and Neil had been living with them for months now.

“No, Neil, listen.” Kevin stood as well, placing heavy hands on Neil’s shoulders. “We’ll go to the wedding with _dates_.”

“Uh, okay.” Jean had already told Neil he didn’t have to show up with a date, but Neil was used to telling Kevin anything he wanted to hear. “Ask Thea.”

“Neil, Thea is already going to the wedding with someone else. Do you pay attention to anything?”

“No.”

Kevin shook his head, and then he shook Neil’s shoulders harshly. “Well, pay attention now. We are going to the wedding with dates.”

“Fine.”

“But hear me out!” Kevin took a deep breath, and then grinned at Neil as if waiting for him to acknowledge his brilliance even though Kevin hadn’t said anything yet. Neil shook his head in a _well? what?_ fashion, wriggling under Kevin’s heavy hands. “We choose each _other’s_ dates,” Kevin said with a flourish.

Neil frowned, confused. Hadn’t he just offered Thea and Kevin said no? “Why?” he asked.

Kevin’s head dropped dramatically. “Clearly we have no sense if the two people we chose for ourselves last time left us to be with each other.”

“For the last time, Kevin, Jean and I—”

“It’s _perfect_ ,” Kevin went on, lifting his head and staring off into the distance dramatically. “It’ll make them _both_ jealous.”

Neil sighed. He’d lived with Kevin long enough to know that he couldn’t fight his way out of this. “So I’m just supposed to find you a date for this wedding?” he asked, resignation firm in his tone.

Kevin nodded, and then he started swaying back and forth, shifting his weight from one foot to the other while he thought. His hands were still pinning Neil in front of him, so Neil started swaying with Kevin. “I think I know a few people I could set you up with. You’re not picky, right?”

“There are very few things I could care less about than my date to this wedding.”

“Splendid.” Kevin shifted his position so he could wrap Neil in a hug. Neil did not lift his arms to return the gesture. They were both still swaying. “This is going to be fun,” Kevin said into his ear. “Don’t you think this is going to be fun?”

“It’s definitely going to be something.”

*

Neil didn’t think about finding a date for Kevin until a week later, when he was tutoring Andrew Minyard in Calculus and suddenly remembered that Andrew was on the exy team with Kevin, and he was quite good at it, too. 

Andrew was currently scribbling through a problem after Neil had attempted to explain the equation to him. Andrew, on a sports scholarship, had tutoring hours he had to use as a student athlete. Neil, on a scholarship that didn’t cover all of his costs, got a job as a math tutor to pay the rest of his bills. Neil wasn’t a very friendly tutor and Andrew wasn’t a very good student.

They worked perfectly together.

Sometimes Andrew would come into the math tutoring center while Neil was working and pull out assignments for other classes. Neil didn’t understand why, but he never kicked him out. If Andrew worked with him, Neil didn’t have to help any other student who walked in.

Neil watched Andrew’s fingers work through a problem with a rapt sort of attention Neil rarely gave to anything in his life—but he found that he enjoyed watching Andrew do mundane things. Sometimes Neil would get distracted by the sunlight filtering through the center’s windows and illuminating Andrew’s blonde hair with streaks of gold, and Neil would count the flyaway tufts that were only visible in the dying light of day, when the sun’s rays hit them just right, like a puzzle he had to solve before the sun set.

Andrew would usually catch him and turn up to glare at Neil for staring too long. Much like he was doing now as Neil’s eyes had been tracing the folds and wrinkles of Andrew’s knuckles and fingers while he worked. “What,” Andrew snapped, and Neil suddenly remembered the pact Kevin forced him into.

“Hey, you know Kevin, right?” Neil asked.

Andrew stared at Neil without answering for so long that Neil almost forgot he asked a question.

“Right, right.” Neil scratched his nose. “What I meant to say was you like Kevin, right?”

Andrew’s eyes narrowed. He started fiddling with his pen, putting the cap on it and tapping his lips lightly. “Not really.”

Neil was undeterred. “But you like to be around Kevin, right?”

“No.”

He changed tactics. He realized that anyone who truly liked Kevin wouldn’t really like to be around him. “But you can _tolerate_ being around Kevin?”

“Barely.”

“If you don’t like him, why are you always around?” Neil thought of the countless instances last semester when Kevin and Neil had been doing something around campus: heading to the gym, studying, napping on a vacant couch, watching exy games in the student center. One time Kevin signed up to be a part of the campus’s Lip Sync Competition and Neil babysat Kevin as he got rip-roaring drunk and fumbled about on stage, almost winning the entire competition with an inspiring rendition of Eminem’s “Just Lose It.” At every single one of these instances, Andrew Minyard and sometimes his brother, sometimes his cousin, sometimes both would unceremoniously find and join them. 

Now that Neil was conscious of trying to find someone to be with Kevin, he realized that Andrew was a perfect candidate. He was probably hanging around all the time because he was already interested in Kevin.

Now Neil could make it official.

Andrew, eyes still narrow and studying Neil as he tapped his pen on his lips, eventually said, “Hazards of the job.”

Neil, confused, cocked his head. “What job?”

“Being gay.”

Neil bit back a smile. “That’s a job?”

“It’s a chore when you have bad taste in men.” Andrew reached over and traced the wretched scar on one of Neil’s wrists with the hand that wasn’t tapping his lips with the pen. Neil wondered why Andrew hadn’t just touched him with the pen. He thought Andrew didn’t like to be touched—then again, Andrew didn’t seem to ever have a problem touching Neil.

Neil thought about what it must be like, having a crush on Kevin. He grimaced. “I mean, Kevin is definitely in poor taste.”

Andrew sighed, removing his hand from Neil’s wrist and the pen from his lips. He uncapped the utensil and went back to work. Neil, shrugging, went back studying a random feature on Andrew’s person: this time, the freckles on his neck.

“Why do you always stare at me?” Andrew asked an hour later as he stuffed his assignment in his backpack and Neil walked him to the door, even though he still had two more hours of work.

Neil grinned, thinking about the ten freckles he counted today. “Because I think you’re pretty,” he said, and watched as red crawled up Andrew’s neck before he shoved Neil’s face away and left the tutoring center with a loud and furious huff.

*

Now that Neil had decided to set up Andrew and Kevin, he was resolved to make sure they were around each other as much as possible. 

“You know where Andrew lives, right?” Neil asked. He was making himself a peanut butter sandwich and Kevin was sitting upside down on the couch, his feet draped over the back of it and his hair melding with the shag of the carpet. The TV was running on a marathon of _Ghost Adventures_ that neither boy was watching. Kevin grunted in affirmation.

“Great, let’s go.” Neil slapped his two pieces of bread together and started walking to the door without waiting for Kevin. He didn’t even put the cap on the peanut butter, leaving the knife wedged right in the middle of the condiment to make Kevin mad later.

Kevin moaned, but he slinked into a slow somersault off the couch. “Why? I don’t want to hang out with Andrew.”

Uh oh. Neil hadn’t thought about whether Kevin liked Andrew or not. But Kevin was slowly stomping his way to the door, so maybe he was only grumpy about having to move or something. Neil relaxed. “Don’t you want to bug him? I know how much you like to annoy people.”

Kevin shoved Neil out the door. “That’s _you._ ”

Neil took a bite of his sandwich while he gestured for Kevin to go first. “Oh, right.” Neil _did_ like to annoy people. “Doesn’t he have some video game thing you like?”

Kevin brightened, not fighting Neil so much to walk down the hall. Neil knew Andrew lived in the same building as them, but he didn’t know what floor or what door. Kevin walked to the stairwell and Neil started following him up as Kevin answered, “The VR? Yeah, haven’t you tried it before?”

Neil shook his head, but Kevin couldn’t see. Neil said, “I’ve never been to Andrew’s before.”

“Really?” Kevin sounded surprised. They only went up one flight of stairs before they exited the stairs and Kevin knocked on the first door in the hallway. “He invites me over all the time.”

Neil, smug that his hypothesis was proving right, shook his head. “Why would he invite me over? I’m just his tutor.”

Kevin shrugged. “Well, whatever. He invites me over all the time, says that he and Aaron need two more people to do something or other.” Kevin cocked his head. “Weird, now that I think about it. Why are they always looking for two people?”

“Hm.” Neil didn't know nor care. He took an obnoxious bite of his sandwich, shoving as much of it as he could into his mouth, and Kevin grimaced at the peanut butter and crumbs now all over Neil’s cheeks and around his lips. Neil was grinning at him when the door finally opened to an annoyed Andrew who, as soon as he saw Neil, turned into a very bored and uninterested Andrew who pointedly did not look at Neil and focused all his attention on Kevin.

Neil was pleased. This was all going so well, and he hadn’t even done anything yet. 

Andrew intoned, quite lifelessly, “Day. To what do I owe this pleasure.”

Kevin shrugged, taking a step away from Neil, who was now smacking peanut butter kisses his direction. “I literally don’t know. Neil wanted to come over.”

Andrew turned, very slowly, to face Neil. Neil, his grin growing wider, started kissing peanut butter smooches toward Andrew, who blinked, very slowly, once. He didn’t say anything as he stepped aside and Kevin and Neil shouldered their way into the room. As he was passing him, Neil held up the remainder of his sandwich to Andrew’s lips, his eyes glinting, and Andrew, without pause, put the final bite in his mouth. His lips briefly touched Neil’s fingers as he sucked the bite out of Neil’s hand, and Neil, quite deliberately, smooched one final, wet kiss his direction before wiping his mouth with the back of his hand and stepping his way into the living room. After a long pause, Andrew closed the front door and locked it.

“So what is this VD Kevin was talking about on his way over here?” Neil asked, wiping his hands on his pants and surveying the apartment with interest. The furniture was simple and the TV was large and there was the slight scent of smoke and cooked meat wafting from the kitchen. He liked it here.

Kevin, behind him, choked and coughed, and Neil turned to see Kevin looking embarrassed and annoyed. Andrew, who suddenly looked interested in something, asked, “I don’t know; Kevin, what _is_ this VD you were talking about with Neil on the way over here?”

Kevin shot an aggrieved glance at both Neil and Andrew before settling on Andrew. “Neil, Jesus, it’s _VR_. I came to play the VR.”

Neil shrugged, unperturbed, and turned back to survey the living room and where he could sit. Before he could settle onto the armchair (so Kevin and Andrew could sit next to each other), Andrew was behind him and shoving him to the couch, where Andrew immediately plopped next to him, the entirety of his right side melding to the left of Neil’s. Kevin moved to settle into the armchair, and Neil was about to offer a switch when he realized that this might work better—now Andrew could _see_ Kevin, instead of practically sit in his lap, like Andrew was doing to Neil now.

As soon as Kevin was settled and Andrew was satisfied with the seating arrangement in the room, he stood up and started fiddling with the desktop computer beside the TV, switching cords and untangling controllers and handing them to Kevin, whose face lit up as soon as Andrew handed him the headgear.

And then, seemingly to Neil, they started speaking in a foreign language.

“ _Beat Saber_ ,” Andrew said.

Kevin shook his head. “ _FNAF._ ”

“Are you twelve?”

“I want to be scared.”

“ _Beat Saber._ ”

“ _F_ _NAF_ or we’re leaving, effective immediately.”

Andrew snuck a very, very quick glance to Neil before sighing softly and moving back to the computer to pull up the game Kevin had pouted over. Once it was loaded, Andrew hauled Kevin to his feet and placed him in the middle of the living room, where Neil noticed there was tape marking off an invisible square that Kevin stood inside. Neil was curious about all of this, and he watched attentively as Kevin put on the headgear, pumped his arms in excitement, and then threw his head back and howled.

“Wow,” Neil said. “Does he do this every time?”

Andrew, dodging over under and around Kevin’s flailing limbs, settled flush against Neil’s side again. Neil, not wanting his arm trapped at his side, wriggled it out from between their bodies and settled it on the back of the couch behind Andrew.

“Yes,” Andrew said, and Neil snorted, watching as Kevin mumbled to himself for a minute before he suddenly jumped and screeched.

“Fuck!” he exclaimed, and Neil stopped watching Kevin and started watching the screen.

“What is this?” Neil asked after a minute of watching Kevin go through security cameras of a children’s place and jump every time something moved too fast on the screens on the screen.

“How have you not heard of this game, Neil?” Kevin asked. “It, like, lives in the heart of every twelve year old child.”

“Oh, that’ll do it. My twelve year old heart was living out of a dumpster at the time.”

Kevin sighed as if disappointed, but Neil knew he wasn’t serious. “Neil, you’ve got to stop turning every conversation into your shitty childhood trauma.”

Neil, who hadn’t had to live with his shitty childhood trauma since he was seventeen and the FBI found him, snorted. “You’re right. My bad.”

Kevin opened his mouth again, likely to put his foot in it, when something happened in the game to scare him. Neil settled deeper into the couch, interested by this game, and thusly deeper into Andrew’s side. When he looked over to apologize, he found Andrew, having at some point grabbed Neil’s free hand and began fiddling with it, was now dragging the pads of his fingers over the burn scars on Neil’s knuckles as if memorizing the warps of his skin. Neil, the nerve endings in his hand weak and tarnished, hadn’t even noticed Andrew was touching him. The way Andrew held him, Neil was practically hugging Andrew, which he suspected Andrew must not really like.

Neil moved to pull his arms away, to get out of his space, feeling oddly vulnerable at the mention of his shitty childhood trauma, but Andrew held tight to Neil, not looking away from his hands, and Neil eventually relaxed, but he didn’t turn away from watching Andrew fiddle with the crosshatches on the back of his hand.

When Andrew’s fingers stopped, ending at the scars on Neil’s forearm, he finally looked up and met Neil’s gaze.

Neil smiled at Andrew until Andrew scowled, and then Neil grinned at Andrew until Andrew dropped his hand, and then Neil softly kissed the air between them, and Andrew, without pause, kissed the air back.

*

Neil made them go back everyday that week. Aaron, who lived with Andrew, hadn’t been there that first day, attending class like a good little student, but he was there everyday after that.

“Why are you always here?” Aaron asked the fifth day Neil and Kevin busted into the apartment, not even waiting for Aaron to be out of the way before shoving themselves into the room.

Kevin made a beeline for the TV, and Aaron returned to a plate of food on the table. When Neil realized Andrew wasn’t in the living room, he turned to Aaron. “Where’s Andrew?”

Aaron flicked his hand in the direction of the hallway. “In his room, probably.”

Neil, taking a step down the hall, stopped suddenly and said, “Kevin, go get him.”

Kevin didn’t even bother to look up from the Netflix queue he was browsing. “No.”

“Yes.”

“I’m not allowed in Andrew’s room.”

“Why?”

Kevin shrugged.

Aaron said, “Andrew doesn’t let anyone in there.”

“Really?” Neil, hearing that for the challenge it was, sauntered down the hall and knocked on the only closed door. When only silence answered him, Neil opened the door to find Andrew in the middle of the floor surrounded by spools of yarn and a crochet hook in his hand while he glared furiously at his phone.

Neil, distracted from his plan to distract Andrew, asked excitedly, “Oh, are you crocheting?”

“Not yet,” Andrew said, not bothering to look up from his phone.

“I can teach you,” Neil said, moving to sit across from Andrew and his piles of yarn. “What are you going to make?”

“You know how to crochet?” Andrew asked, finally looking up.

Neil shrugged, reaching for a spare hook and one of the unraveled spools of yarn. “Sure. The foster family I stayed with when I was seventeen was an old couple, and the woman taught me how to knit and stuff. Knitting is more fun, but crocheting is easier.”

“You were in foster care?” Andrew asked. Neil looked up to see Andrew staring at him with a strange intensity.

“Yeah,” Neil told him. “For a year. I was put into the system when I was seventeen because I had to have some sort of guardianship after all my shitty childhood trauma. They were nice. I still call them sometimes.” Neil cleared his throat. Andrew was still staring at him. “So, are you ready? What do you want to make?”

Andrew stared at Neil for a long time. Eventually, he said, “A cat sweater.”

“You don’t have a cat.”

“I just want the sweater.”

Neil laughed. “How about a blanket?”

*

After Neil showed Andrew the basic stitches, sitting side-by-side on the floor with their backs against Andrew’s bed, Andrew breathing on his hands while he leaned in to watch Neil work, Neil suggested they go to the craft store and pick out more spools of yarn and a bigger hook for Andrew to make a blanket.

As they walked out of the room, Neil remembered he was supposed to be here setting up Andrew with Kevin. When they entered the living room, Kevin and Aaron were sitting on the couch watching a Korean drama with oddly wobbly lips and misty eyes.

“Are you _crying_?” Neil asked.

“Yes!” Kevin said, while Aaron hastily wiped at his eyes. “You don’t understand, Neil, your feelings are stunted and sad.”

“Right. We’re going to the store. Let’s go.”

Andrew, sidling up beside Neil, suggested blandly, “Let them go get food.”

“What?” Aaron asked.

“Huh?” Neil asked.

“I’m watching a _show_ ,” Kevin said. 

Neil frowned at Andrew “We can just get food when we’re done.”

“I want to eat here.”

“We’ll bring it home.”

“Aaron owes me food.”

“The fuck I do, asshole.”

“So you can pick where we go?”

“No.”

Andrew, apparently done with this conversation, grabbed Neil by the front of the shirt and dragged him out the front door, ignoring Neil’s protests and urgings for Kevin and Aaron to come, too. They did not rise to follow. Aaron picked up the remote to resume the episode. Kevin wiped his eyes.

Oh well. Maybe next time.

*

When Neil and Kevin returned the next day, Andrew was curled into a ball in a fully crocheted black and purple blanket. Kevin disappeared down the hall to find Aaron, and Neil beamed down at Andrew.

“This looks really nice.”

“Hm.” Andrew yawned.

Neil picked up the corner of the blanket to inspect the stiches, and Andrew shifted so that he wasn’t curled into quite as tight of a ball in the corner of the couch. “But did you even sleep? What the fuck?”

“Andrew has insomnia, jackass,” Aaron said, entering the space with Kevin on his heels. “We thought maybe this would distract him into sleep, but he just finished a fucking blanket instead.”

“Oh,” Neil said, dropping the blanket. He frowned down at Andrew, upset at the thought of him not sleeping. Andrew stared up at him, not impressed with Neil’s disproval. After a minute, Andrew shifted into a sitting position and held up half of the blanket in offering, and Neil, noticing that Kevin and Aaron were arguing about food in the kitchen, slid into his spot by Andrew’s side and under the blanket.

Andrew resumed the show about gymnastics he was watching, and Neil cuddled his face into the blanket, breathing deep the scent of yarn and smoke and Andrew. He loved curling into a handmade thing, and especially loved knowing Andrew made this. When Andrew finally turned to look at him, Neil smiled, face still buried in the stitches.

Andrew scowled at him, so Neil poked his fingers through the holes of the blanket and curled them in Andrew’s face like a beast to its prey. “Grrr,” he said, and Andrew pushed his own fingers through holes and linked his hand with Neil’s, the strands of the blanket thick and heavy between their palms.

“No,” Andrew said, and then turned back to the TV, but he didn’t unhook their fingers, and Neil, grinning, settled deeper into the cushions.

*

Neil almost forgot that Kevin was also trying to set Neil up with someone.

“You’re going roller-skating tomorrow,” Kevin said to him one night. They were at their own apartment this time, having been kicked out of Andrew’s by Aaron, who “literally couldn’t take it anymore.” Kevin was sprawled on Neil’s bed and Neil was sitting at his desk working on homework when Kevin broke the news to him.

“Ew, why,” Neil asked.

“What do you mean ‘ew’? You love physical activity.”

“Not when it’s forced on me.”

“That’s a goddamn lie.”

“Nuh uh.”

“Shut up. You’re going.”

“With who?”

“Allison.”

Neil finally pulled his attention away from his homework so he could frown at Kevin. “Um, Allison, the girl who stole my clothes out of the boys’ locker room and burned them after I made fun of her shoes?”

Kevin nodded.

“ _Why_?”

“She could be your date to the wedding.”

“Ew, no.”

“Shut up, Neil, you’re going.”

Neil frantically tried to think of a way out of this, but he knew there was no way out of this without fleeing the country, which was something he vowed to never do again. Instead, he thought of a way to make it more bearable and asked, “Will you come?”

Kevin, not surprised in the least, sighed. “Yes.”

“Can you invite Andrew?”

“Ew, no.”

Neil smirked, turning back to his homework, which was coincidentally next to his phone, which coincidentally had Andrew’s phone number on it. He texted Andrew.

N: what would it take for you to say yes  
A: not a lot  
N: wow, really? you don’t even know what I’m going to ask  
A: so ask  
N: will you say yes?  
A: yes  
N: cool see you tomorrow  
A: cool

Neil put his phone face down. He told Kevin, “Okay, Andrew will be there, too.”

Kevin groaned, kicking his feet like a child. “Fine, can we invite Aaron?”

“Ew, no.”

“I’m texting him.”

“Ew, fine.”

“Stop it.”

“Ew, no.”

“Ew, you’re so annoying.”

“Ew, get out of my room.”

“Ew, no.”

“Ew, yes.”

“Ew, Aaron said he’ll come.”

“Ew, no.”

“Ew, bitch.”

“Ew, _bitch_.”

*

Kevin didn’t tell Neil that he had planned for them to have dinner first, so Neil was blindsided into having a date with Allison Reynolds, the girl who burned his clothes. Neil actually didn’t hold a grudge against her; he thought it was kind of funny.

And the fact that she wore the shoes he had insulted on their date made him like her a little more.

But not enough to try on the date, or ask any questions, or elaborate on his answers when she asked him things. He nodded and responded and ate his food and his mood didn’t improve until they were walking to the roller rink and he remembered that, oh right, he actually _did_ love physical activity. He turned to beam at Allison, and she rolled her eyes.

Right at that moment was when Kevin, Aaron, and Andrew showed up. Kevin and Aaron were off to the side joking about something, and Andrew was standing in front of the door and wouldn’t let Neil through, his arms crossed and his eyes narrowed. “You didn’t tell me you were on a date,” he said.

Allison scoffed loudly behind Neil. “Oh, is that what this was supposed to be?”

Neil grinned down at Andrew. And then, just because he felt like it, he winked.

Andrew pursed his lips, stared at Neil in consideration, and then turned his attention to Allison. He gave her a deep and thorough once over, pausing long on her shoes, and then he disregarded her so completely and utterly that Neil couldn’t help but laugh.

“Careful,” he said, and then pushed Andrew aside so he could hold the door open for Allison. “She’ll burn your clothes.”

“Speaking from experience?” Andrew asked.

“Yes.”

Andrew shot Neil another appraising look, and then turned back to Allison, and shrugged, and moved to the rent counter.

Allison looked at Andrew and said loudly, “Why is he so short?”

Andrew’s shoulders tensed, poised to fight, and Neil rushed to stand behind Andrew, flush against his back so he couldn’t turn around. Neil raised his arms in case he had to stop Andrew, but all Andrew did was melt into Neil’s body, and Neil relaxed. He braced his hands on the rent counter, barricading Andrew in his arms.

Cool. No fights tonight, then. Neil smiled as one of the employees came to get their shoe sizes and take their money. Andrew was still leaning against Neil, his head nestled comfortably in the crook of Neil's neck. Neil turned his face to put his nose in Andrew’s hair and took a deep, obnoxious sniff. “Is this new shampoo?” he asked, his voice low, his lips by Andrew’s ear. “You smell like coconut.”

Andrew, his tone tight, said, “No. Apple.”

Neil grinned, keeping his mouth by Andrew’s ear. “ _No_ it’s not new or _no_ it is new and it smells like apple?”

Andrew shivered. “Yes.” His voice sounded choked.

Neil frowned, taking a step back and evaluating Andrew, whose neck looked very red and he wouldn’t meet Neil’s eyes. “Are you cold?” Neil asked.

Andrew took his skates and stomped off toward a bench. “No,” he said. 

“Woooooow,” Allison drawled, watching all of this with wide eyes.

*

Skating was fun—at least for Neil. Mostly he took laps around the rink, leaving behind all his friends and his date and enjoying the feel of the wind pushing back his hair. At one point Allison kept pace with him and held his hand and swung their arms exaggeratedly before she let go and cackled her way around the rink, stopping to flirt with a girl leaning over the rail and sipping from a drink.

Kevin and Aaron traded off between racing each other and outperforming each other doing convoluted swings and taps with their skates. They did not leave each other’s sides. Andrew circled the rink and tried to trip Neil every time he went by. Later in the night, Neil, who had been going too fast for his own good, crashed and burned and didn’t get up until Andrew skated up to him and stared balefully down at him.

Neil, grinning, said, “Hey, will you teach me how to skate?”

“You know how to skate.”

Neil looked down at his sorry state. Both of his knees were bleeding. “I don’t think I do. Won’t you teach me?”

“No.”

“But don’t you want to hold my hand?” Neil made grabby hands at Andrew, who looked so offended by the gesture that he left Neil and skated two more times around the rink before grabbing Neil’s hand on the third time around and dragging him across the rink still flat on his ass. Neil, breathless and laughing, convinced Andrew to let him up and link arms with him before they started to make slow laps around the rink. Neil did not know where Allison was. Kevin and Aaron were playing at the random skee ball machine the roller rink had. Everything smelled sweaty and rubbery, and Neil’s knees and arms burned from his fall, but he felt so full and bright.

After a few laps of slow circles, Neil said, “Boring.”

Andrew said, “Then let go.”

“No.”

“Then shut up.”

“No.”

But Neil did shut up, and he didn’t let go.

*

Neil kept forgetting that Andrew was supposed to be _Kevin’s_ date to the wedding. He was doing all this to set up Andrew and _Kevin._

But then Andrew would come into the tutoring center and show Neil all his annotations of the book he was reading for class, or Andrew would make him take selfies with weird filters, or Andrew would pull out his phone and ask Neil dumb questions and film his dumb answers, but he wouldn’t post the videos anywhere; he’d just film Neil vehemently explaining the advantages of a Casio calculator over a TI-89 calculator and saying, quite spiritedly, _Texas Instruments can suck my dick,_ and then Andrew would save the video and put his phone away and go back to work.

And Neil would forget, again, that Andrew was half in love with Kevin, and needed to go to the wedding with Kevin, because he had a crush on _Kevin._

*

It was weird, but Kevin and Aaron were watching a slice-of-life anime, and one of the characters was cleaning the ears of another one, and Neil wondered aloud why they looked so happy having their ears cleaned, so Kevin paused the show, and pulled out his phone, and read some articles, and they all learned that in Japanese culture, cleaning out someone’s ear was considered intimate and sometimes even romantic.

So Neil, naturally, ordered one of the puffball ear cleaners online and waited two days for it to come in the mail.

“Why do you have that?” Kevin asked after Neil unboxed it with a self-satisfied look on his face.

“I bought it for Jean’s bachelor party,” Neil said.

“Are you serious?”

“Yeah, and then we’ll do the teapot nose thing after.”

“You’re messing with me.”

“Who could say? Come on; lay thine head upon my lap.”

“No.”

Neil, who didn’t really buy this for Kevin, sighed but didn’t press it. He walked to the front door. “Where are you going?” Kevin asked.

“Where do you think?” Neil shot back, and then went up the stairs to find Andrew.

*

When Andrew opened the door, Neil flickered the puffball under Andrew’s nose.

Andrew batted the stick away and said, “No.”

Neil asked, “What would it take to make you say yes?”

Andrew paused. “Not a lot.”

“Will you say yes?”

“Yes.”

Neil walked to the couch and sat down. He patted his lap with the tops of his fingers, saying nothing. Andrew locked the door, and then he sat beside Neil on the couch, but he didn’t look at Neil and he didn’t lay down.

Neil patted his thighs again in silence. Andrew stared straight ahead for a full minute before he slowly lowered his head onto Neil’s thighs so that his face was toward the room. He rested one palm on one of Neil’s knees. The other he curled into his body.

Neil, who had planned to blow into Andrew’s ear to tease him, suddenly understood why this was considered reverent and intimate in Japan. It felt that way now, Andrew curled onto his lap, saying nothing, breathing shallowly.

Trusting Neil not to hurt him.

Neil didn’t blow into Andrew’s ear. He hovered a hand over Andrew’s face and asked, “Is this okay?”

Andrew said, “Yes,” so Neil started combing his fingers through Andrew’s hair, tucking it out of his way behind his ear. He spent a lot of time smoothing Andrew’s hair away from his ear, but he wanted to enjoy this. Neil had wanted to touch Andrew’s hair for a long time.

When Neil was satisfied, he readied the puffball ear cleaner. He gave Andrew one last glance and noticed that his eyes were closed. He studied Andrew on his lap for one more second before he braced his free hand on top of Andrew’s head and got to work.

Andrew tensed at first, but Neil had watched a lot of videos before this, and he wanted to be extra cautious so he didn’t dig that hard. Eventually Andrew relaxed, and Neil did his best. Mostly he enjoyed the feeling of Andrew, warm and breathing on top of him, and the thought that he could do this for someone, and that Andrew had let him, and that Andrew had closed his eyes.

When he was satisfied with his work on that ear, Neil leaned down and whispered quietly, “It’s time to switch.” Neil readied for Andrew to sit up so Neil could scoot down for Andrew to rest his other ear on Neil’s lap, but instead of sitting up, Andrew just rolled over, pushing his nose into Neil’s abdomen, and took a deep breath. 

“Uh,” Neil breathed. “Is that okay?” 

Andrew nodded. His eyes were still closed. Neil gently combed through Andrew’s hair again, and then leaned over and worked on cleaning Andrew’s other ear. The motion pushed Andrew’s face farther into Neil’s stomach, and Andrew’s breath was hot every time he exhaled. His breaths were deep and level, and when Andrew’s arm, which had been curled around Neil’s waist, went slack, Neil slowly pulled back from what he was doing. 

Andrew was asleep. 

Neil placed the puffball ear cleaner on the arm of the couch and then held very still, but when he tried to move the hand he had braced on Andrew’s scalp, Andrew protested sleepily, nuzzling his nose into Neil’s stomach. 

“Pushy,” Neil whispered before he curled both hands into Andrew’s hair and combed and pet until Andrew relaxed. 

*

Neil realized that Andrew was awake when he felt a soft touch on his hip. Neil had been catnapping on and off for the past hour, not wanting to wake Andrew but also the TV wasn’t on and he couldn’t let go of Andrew to grab his phone and he was pretty bored. Even though it felt like a waste of a day, Neil had decided to nap with Andrew, but he could only fall into a half sleep, zoning hard but not enough to fall under. 

When he felt Andrew’s fingers probing the skin of his hip underneath his shirt, he opened his eyes and wiggled. “Hey,” he said, his voice still soft even though they were both awake. “Stop that.” 

Andrew mumbled something under his breath but withdrew his hand and instead rubbed Neil in the same spot but above his shirt. His motions were languid, and his face was still pressed into Neil’s stomach, but he stretched out his legs on the couch. 

“Don’t be grumpy,” Neil said. “Some of us just have very nasty scars they don’t like to show off.” 

“But your face,” Andrew grumbled. Neil moved his fingers so he could tug on Andrew’s earlobe. 

“But _your_ face,” Neil parried, and Andrew finally removed that face from Neil’s stomach. He looked up at Neil with drowsy eyes, and then back to his abdomen, and then back to Neil, and Neil sighed. 

Neil grabbed the bottom of his shirt and lifted just enough so Andrew could see the gashes on his stomach. 

Andrew, his head still pillowed on Neil’s thighs, hummed. He lifted a hand as if to touch, but stopped. He looked up at Neil and asked, “Can I?” and Neil thought that was weird because Andrew didn’t have to ask to touch Neil, never had a problem with that before, but Neil said “Yes” anyways and then Andrew leaned forward and pressed a wet kiss on a scar beside Neil’s belly button. 

“Um,” Neil said, and his voice cracked. “Why did you do that?” 

Andrew shrugged before he leaned in and kissed another one. It was very slow and very dragging. Neil thought he felt teeth. 

“Um,” he cracked again, and then Andrew closed his eyes and followed a scar with his tongue, stopping where it disappeared down Neil’s waistline. 

Neil thought about Kevin, and thought about Andrew, and Jeremy and Jean and himself, and he realized he was an idiot, and he wanted Andrew to kiss his stomach again. “Uh oh,” he rasped, and then Andrew turned his face up, his eyes hooded but not from sleep, and Neil placed a finger under Andrew’s chin and tipped it even higher. 

He moved his finger to outline Andrew’s lips. Andrew pressed a kiss to the pad of Neil’s finger. Neil pushed down on his lips, and Andrew opened his mouth and bit down. 

“Ow,” Neil said. Andrew bit down harder. Neil’s other hand was still in Andrew’s hair, so he grabbed a handful and tugged. Andrew sucked Neil’s finger into his mouth. His tongue was very warm and very all over Neil’s finger. 

Neil leaned down into Andrew’s space and said, “I want you to kiss me.” 

Andrew spat out Neil’s finger and brought his hands up to Neil’s face and held him still while he pulled himself up and pressed his lips to Neil’s. 

*

“Where have you been?” 

“Making out with Andrew.” 

“Finally.” 

“You’re going to have to find your own date to the wedding.” 

“Jesus, were you trying to set me up with _Andrew_?” 

“Yes.” 

“Neil, he’s been into you for, like, two semesters. You guys flirt all the time.” 

“I know that now.” 

“You’re a fucking idiot.” 

“Yeah, Andrew said that before he stuck his tongue down my throat.” 

“Disgusting.” 

*

Kevin burst into Neil’s room to find Andrew straddling Neil’s hips, Neil’s shirt on the floor, Neil’s hands tucked into the back of Andrew’s pants, Andrew’s hands cradling Neil’s throat. They all three stared at each other until Kevin’s attention snagged on one of Neil’s scars. 

“Where did you get that?”

Neil looked down at himself. “Which one?” 

“The one under your nipple.” 

“Oh, I rolled off the couch onto the coffee table a couple months ago.” 

“Kevin has seen you shirtless?” Andrew asked. His hands were still around Neil’s throat. He was frowning. 

Neil frowned back. “Well, yeah, we’ve lived together for four years.” 

“Kevin is not allowed in here anymore.” 

“Andrew, Neil was mine first,” Kevin argued, not really caring but also very competitive and quite possessive. 

“No,” Andrew said, and then covered Neil’s face with his hands. “Five dollar entry.” 

Neil sputtered a laugh behind Andrew’s hands and Kevin asked, incredulous, “To come into Neil’s room?” 

“To come into your apartment.” 

“Andrew, you’re being ridiculous.” 

“Ten dollars to speak.” 

“Get off Neil.” 

“No.” 

“Neil, get up.” 

“I can’t. Andrew weighs, like, two hundred pounds— _oof._ ” Neil curled into himself, wheezing, as Andrew moved his fist away from Neil’s ribs. Andrew rolled off Neil.

“What do you want, Kevin?” Neil asked, still gasping for breath. 

“We need to go wedding clothes shopping.” Andrew, who had been inspecting his nails innocuously, suddenly perked up. 

Neil groaned, grabbing a pillow and hitting himself in the face with it. “Jean said he would pick it out for me.” 

“Neil, Jean is the enemy.” 

“No, Jean is my best friend.” 

“No,” Andrew said. “Jean is the enemy.” 

Kevin pointed at Andrew as if that proved he had been right all along, but Neil still had the pillow over his face. He groaned again. 

“Anyways,” Kevin said, “Jean told _me_ to take care of it.” 

Neil dropped the pillow. “You’ve spoken with Jean?” 

“It’s called the Art of War, Neil. Keep your enemies close.” 

“No, it’s keep your enemies _closer_.”

“Closer than what?”

“Objects in the mirror.” 

“Shut the fuck up, Neil.” 

Andrew, who had been sitting beside Neil, turned so he could swing a leg over Neil again. Kevin grimaced. 

“We’re leaving in five minutes,” he said, backing through the doorway. 

“Ten minutes,” Andrew said. His hands were sliding down Neil’s chest. 

“Ten?” Neil teased. His hands cupped Andrew's elbows, sliding up and over his shoulders and into his hair.

“Twenty.” 

“ _Five_ ,” Kevin said, slamming the door closed. 

*

Andrew was wrapped like a burrito in his crocheted blanket, tip to tail, curled around Neil on the floor, who was sitting cross-legged in Andrew's living room and reading a poetry book for one of his classes. 

“Are you sure you don’t want to hear this poem? I’m pretty sure he’s trying to convince a woman to sleep with him by means of a flea.” 

“Gross.” Andrew’s voice was muffled. The only thing visible of him was his hair. 

“You mean that’s not romantic?” 

“It’s a bug.” 

“Okay, I left you a poem on your bed. Do not read it.” 

Andrew, wriggling against Neil, stopped. “What does it say.” 

“I can’t remember. I wrote it at four in the morning. I think the last line is ‘your ass is grass, nice.’” 

Andrew didn’t reply, and Neil dropped a hand somewhere on Andrew’s worm-burrito body and left it there. He hadn’t realized that Andrew fell asleep until Aaron came into the room an hour later and startled Andrew awake by slamming the fridge closed. 

Andrew sat up, the blanket slipping from his head, though he was still wrapped everywhere else. He looked grumpy. Neil grinned. 

“Was he just asleep?” Aaron asked in disbelief. 

“I make him feel safe,” Neil replied, and grunted when Andrew kicked him. 

*

“Kevin, who are you bringing to the wedding, it's in two weeks.”

“I don't fucking know. You were supposed to find my date.”

“Well, the person I was going to set you up with was actually in love with me, so I don't know.”

“You're hopeless.”

“Hey, you know what, though? Technically there are two of them.”

“Huh. You know what? You're right.”

“Wow. Can I get that in writing?”

“Shut up, Neil.”

“You're supposed to pay five dollars to be here. Ten to speak to me.”

“I hate you.”

“Can I get that in writing?”

“You can get my foot in your ass.”

“Hey, let's go to Andrew’s.”

“Why, do you miss him?”

“Well, yeah.”

“Ugh. Fine. I have to ask Aaron to the ball, anyways.”

*

Andrew and Neil were lying in Andrew's bed and Andrew was as far from Neil as he could get and facing the wall. 

Neil was saying, “Andrew. I have to go. I'm the best man."

Andrew shuffled closer to the edge of the bed and farther from Neil, saying nothing. Neil smothered a smile.

“Andrew,” Neil chastised. Andrew shuffled farther away. “You're gonna fall off the bed.” Andrew tugged the blankets over his shoulder and thus partially off of Neil. Neil's smile broke through. “Okay, fine. But just remember that the last thing you said to me was 'clean yourself up' and you won't see me again for two days while I'm at Jean's bachelor party.” Andrew tugged until the entire blanket was off Neil. Neil rolled onto his back and huffed a laugh. “Okay. Fine. Goodnight, then.” Neil laced his fingers over his stomach and fell asleep, but he woke up thirty minutes later to Andrew curled against his side and snoring softly.

*

“Your tie is crooked.”

“Fix it, then.”

“Fine, bossy pants.”

Kevin fixed Neil's tie in silence. The twins were waiting for them in the living room while they got ready in the bathroom. Neil studied Kevin’s calm expression and said, “I thought you'd be freaking out more.”

Kevin shrugged. “I guess I just don't care anymore.”

Neil nodded in understanding. “The Minyards are good at making you not care about things.”

Kevin rolled his eyes, dropping his hands from Neil’s tie. “No, Neil, the Minyards care too much. _You_ don't care about anything.”

“I care about you.”

“Stop, or Andrew will come in here and demand more monetary compensation for me being in your life.”

“I should have thought to do that years ago.”

Kevin shoved Neil's shoulder playfully before pulling him into a tight hug. Neil decided he could go along with Kevin just this once and hugged him back. “Hey, man,” Kevin said. “You're a good friend.”

“You too, Kevin.”

“Tonight's gonna be fun, huh?”

“Well,” Neil said, thinking fondly of the two boys waiting for them in the other room. “It's definitely going to be something.”

**Author's Note:**

> deleted scenes:  
> -neil telling jean he's bringing a date  
> -aaron telling andrew kevin asked him to the wedding  
> -a montage of kevin's dates for neil  
> -literally everyone in the world saying jean and neil had been dating and neil being like ???no??who???  
> -the wedding
> 
> exy exists but I gave no reason for why neil doesn't play it lol  
> i borrowed the same backstory i gave neil in tit for tat because i think it's cute  
> thanks for being here i luv u  
> 

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [[podfic] definitely something](https://archiveofourown.org/works/27335044) by [growlery](https://archiveofourown.org/users/growlery/pseuds/growlery)




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